Friday, October 21, 2011
pull me out from this bad dream please.
the pain just gets greater each time.
or probably cause i can't take it anymore.
just let me forget everything or just let things be as what they were then.
i need to know why. yes i do.
i can't let go without knowing why.
peihan jab the
green man 10:53:00 pm =P
***
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
you meet someone.
you two get close.
it's all great for a while.
then someone stops trying.
talks less.
awkward conversations.
the drifting.
no communication whatsoever.
memories start to fade.
then the person you know
becomes that person you KNEW.
that's how it usually goes, right?
sad isn't it.
yeah damn damn sad shit.
it hard to maintain any type of relationships.
i, especially suck at it.
it's so fucking sad.
i'm not strong enough to take this emotional stress.
everyday i wish this was just a dream.
that things will go back as how it was like before.
so happy everyday.
so eager to do anything together.
feels good even listening to nonsense and complaints.
or me talking nonsense bout my daily activities.
i don't even know why it turned out like that.
it hurts so much more when there is no reason for the sudden change.
one should never put too much into any relationship.
less getting upset after that.
this is a freaking vicious cycle i go through every few years.
happiness will never last.
there will be a equal and opposite reaction after which.
sadness and pain is so hard to control.
feel like puking some days from the few word reply.
feel so lonely and depressed when there is no reply.
for now i can only sleep and dream and hope i can find happiness in my dreams.
or get out to drink to forget it temporarily.
it really hurts.
i wish i can translate it to physical pain like how i used to do.
at least i can tolerate that kind of pain better than this.
whats difficult at the same time is to act normal and happy and crazy like how i usually do.
so that people won't think i have a problem.
and you lied.
tired for a month.
yeah. same lame excuses which i don't know why you did it.
life sucks man.
the worst part of it all is that we can never be like how it used to be.
and i wonder when i can be as happy as those days.
tiring yet happy.
things were great.
thanks for the great time.
miss you jiejie!
i guess this will be the end.
let me be depressed til i get over it.
hopfully time will heal this hurt.
peihan jab the
green man 2:00:00 am =P
***
